Dates: Coincidence or Fate?

There are a few things in in my life that I pride myself on: making amazing smoothies, being organized as hell, and remember dates (although sometimes birthdays can creep up on me quickly-oops). A little story for ya- I learned right away that Tyler is God awful at learning dates or just very selective on what he chooses to remember. We met about three weeks after my 24th birthday (my birthday is January 9th and we met February 5). Tyler had almost an entire year to remember my birthday and lucky for him, he did (though he probably had to ask my mom or my sister, haha) and made it amazing. However, during a conversation several months later, our birthdays were brought up and Tyler got a huge ass surprise- I was actually a year older than he initially thought. Then after we got married, he repeatedly kept putting down that I was born in 1985, but it was 86. I won’t even tell the story about when he thought our “wedding” anniversary was…but at least he got the month right 😉 Back to the reason behind this post.

Over the past two years, I had been noting my cycles and ovulation days even when Tyler was deployed so I had a track record of what my body was doing. If you’ve been following my blog for a while, you’ll know that you can learn SO much from this information, and that it’s extremely important when trying to conceive. I got a period a couple of days after returning home from Colorado which was the end of August. My cycles would run between about 29-35 days long, but when I wasn’t on fertility meds or herbal supplements and when I was  running a lot, they could sometimes be 40-50+ days apart. Anyways, Tyler was going to be leaving for the field on September 15, so we both figured it was worth a shot to try one last time before he’d be gone for a month (I’d start the birth control for the IVF process with my following cycle). I had a prescription for Femara, but after discussing it, we both agreed that I would just take the herbal supplements (I’d call if my fertility cocktail, haha) instead as I responded so well to it two months before. I also knew I was going to eat pineapple core five to six days post ovulation which helps increase blood flow to the uterus increasing chances of implantation.

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By the last day, I was seriously gagging trying to get the core down, haha.

September 10, 2013 was the day we learned that we had miscarried.

On September 9, 2015 I got a positive ovulation test in the early afternoon…which means I ovulated somewhere between September 10-11 (Tyler is adamant we conceived on September 11…so that’d be twice that date changed his path in life😑).

I know this sounds crazy and may not seem like a big deal, but I find it bizarre how we conceived this beautiful miracle just about two years to the date that we were told our first went to heaven. And, it brings me some strange comfort that our angel baby is watching over his or her younger sibling…

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Some people know that they conceived on their honeymoon (I was still on birth control until 6 months after we were married, lol!) or anniversary or some other significant date. That’s sweet and romantic and all, but those that have actively been trying to conceive for a while know that those tender thoughts are pretty unrealistic to us. The length of cycles, LH surges/ovulation tests, and blood work all dictate the fertility window, and all the sexiness, all the passionate, tender thoughts about baby-making completely vanishes. I used to envy those that weren’t really trying or that it just happened to, but I don’t anymore. We’ve both gained an immense amount of knowledge about the reproductive system and how everything has to perfectly line up for conception to occur (there’s a lot of shit involved!). Together, we’ve experienced heartache, monotonous months of trying and failing, heated arguments about treatment options, and a deployment where neither of us were sure if Tyler would come home.

But you know what? Despite the bad times- the times I’d cry on my husband’s shoulder after a failed cycle or after receiving news that I didn’t ovulate yet again…or the times we’d argue because I’d be moody and emotional after seeing several cute pregnancy announcements and think “Why not ME?!” and he couldn’t understand why…or the times I’d cry myself to sleep, praying that I’d see my husband again and that he’d be a father some day…I wouldn’t change our path for the world.

I don’t know if it was coincidence or fate as to how these dates lined up, but we’re so thankful for this amzing blessing.

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