Still pregnant! Tomorrow I’ll be 39 weeks, so I’m posting this recap of the past two weeks today.
Maternity clothes? Yes.
Stretch marks? Nope.
Sleep: Really good when I can sleep. I’ve been good for the most part (aside from getting up about 3 times), but I’ve had a few nights when I woke up and could NOT fall back asleep. My mind was racing and I was having just all around anxiety but I couldn’t pinpoint what it was from. I know I’m at the point in the pregnancy when all we can do is wait until she’s ready to come, but I’m still so, so worried will happen…I hate writing this and I’m NOT being negative- just being truthful. I know it’s my anxiety that’s getting the best of me, but I’ll go into more detail later in this post.
Best moment: Feeling her moving around…I absolutely LOVE this about pregnancy. Spending evenings and weekends with Tyler. We’ve been grilling out, watching movies at home, going to the movies (well, only twice as there isn’t much out that looks good), and it’s nice having this time together without rushing to do last minute things. My brother got me a baby book for her that I spent time earlier this week filling out (well, I filled out what I could about the pregnancy and whatnot). It obviously mostly focuses on her first couple of years, and it was probably my most favorite gift. My grandma gave me my dads a few months ago, and it’s so cool to read. I know it’s not something she’ll appreciate until she’s way older, but I think having stuff like this is important. I’m sure every first time mom says that, but I’m pretty good with keeping up with things like that 😉 We also got our maternity pictures back (had them done at 37 weeks exactly), and I LOVE them!
Miss anything? Aside from some of the food I’ve mentioned in the last couple of posts, no.
Movement: Yes- some days she’s more active than others though.
Food cravings: Nothing sounds great anymore. I like breakfast and dinner the best and like looking forward to these meals, but seriously nothing sounds appetizing. So no, there haven’t been any cravings. My homemade smoothies are probably what I want the most though, but I always crave these when the weather is hot.
Anything making you feel queasy or sick: Not really. Easy, simple meals are what sound the best though.
Workouts: Walking a shit ton!!! Seriously, I’ve been using my Fitbit after not using it for basically the entire pregnancy (walking to and from the bathroom was my exercise the first 4-5 months, haha), and I’ve been logging in at least 10,000 steps a day which may not sound like much, but when you’re almost 40 weeks pregnant, I’ll say that’s pretty damn good 😉 The weather is beautiful here and I really enjoy these leisurely walks- sometimes alone and sometimes with the dogs (one at a time, I can’t handle walking both of them together!). Light free weights as well. And stretching. I’m still so not flexible, haha.
Symptoms: Lower back pain -it’s really hard to get comfortable. I think I stand/walk so much because sometimes that feels better than sitting down. This is probably TMI but it’s a fact that I didn’t know about beforehand, but leakage. We actually went to Triage about two weeks ago because I thought there might be a leak in my amniotic fluid sack (it’s a clear liquid). They tested it and it wasn’t, but yeah. It’s a lot, no fun, and kinda freaks me out sometimes. Contractions but nothing consistent.
Belly button in or out? Out.
Wedding ring on or off? On
Emotions: As I mentioned above, I’ve been pretty anxious. Don’t get me wrong- I’m enjoying this time with myself and my husband before everything changes. I’m relaxing, watching shows, reading books, enjoying walks, etc., but I’ve had some not-so-great moments. I’m pretty sure many pregnant women get like this at this point, but I’m also terrified and I’m not sure if that’s relatable to those that have not experienced a loss or infertility. Losses haunt you no matter how far along you were. Infertility makes you think that this is too good to be true, and with these two aspects coupled together, you live in a state of apprehension and fear.
With someone that deals with anxiety to begin with, it’s quite…overwhelming…when you’re pregnant and have these issues behind you. Medication (though I wasn’t on it that long- just after our miscarriage and when Tyler deployed), exercise, and having a drink (not a good way to deal with anxiety or depression, I know) were ways that I dealt with this before…and I had none of this throughout the past nine months to help calm my emotions. It’s been challenging, but also an awesome thing as I’ve had to find other outlets to push out my fears, such as talking through them with those closest to me, crafting, organizing, and really just taking a good, hard look at what I’m feeling at the moment and why. I could go on about this, but I’ll stop here. I just want it to be known that while we’ve been so incredibly blessed to be experiencing a pregnancy, it’s still very scary.
Looking forward to? Meeting our baby girl- hopefully within the next WEEK!!!!