Second Trimester Pregnancy Eats

Although I’m a few weeks into my third trimester, I’m wondering if my food aversions and cravings (or lack thereof) will change as they did in the middle of the second trimester, especially since the nausea has come back every once in a while. Because I experienced morning sickness longer than some, I only ate really bland foods the first five months. However, the past two and a half months have been pretty great and though there are still things that I normally like that sound freaking gross or I’ll get sick every once in a while, it’s SO nice to have more options again. I’m all about giving into cravings and splurging every now and then, but the baby gets what I eat and that’s important to me. I don’t want her hating fruits and veggies like her daddy 😉 That will not be tolerated in this household, haha.

I’m sharing what meals and snacks have been appealing to me since all day sickness subsided as I know how much everyone cares 😉 No, but really, I find it so intriguing how pregnancy messes with your taste buds, and I want to remember all of this shit in case it doesn’t happen again!

Breakfast is typically:

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Greek yogurt, granola, banana, and vanilla flavored almonds

A bowl of cereal (Honey Bunches of Oats or a Multigrain Cheerios or Special K variety) with sliced banana

An egg scramble with spinach, tomato, and green pepper, sprinkled with black pepper and oregano and Asiago cheese and a slice of buttered whole wheat toast

Plain scrambled eggs with cheddar and black pepper (Tyler makes the best!) and buttered toast

Whole wheat toast or an English muffin with crunchy peanut butter and sliced banana sprinkled with cinnamon

An Asiago bagel (I stocked up before we left El Paso- our Super Target sold fresh Einstein bagels and I raided the this kind for a week before we left and froze them, haha. SO good!) with plain cream cheese.

I’ve done overnight oats which I normally love a few times, but it just doesn’t sound appealing, nor does oatmeal.

Lunch is sometimes hard for me. I get super tired if I have a big meal in the middle of the day and I simply can’t eat huge ass portions anymore without feeling sick as I get full fast with my growing belly. Because of this, I often times have snack plates instead throughout the day that consist of:

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A fruit- a sliced honey crisp or pink lady apple, pear, grapes, or a couple of cuties

Veggies- raw carrots, cherry (or are they grape?) tomatoes, sliced cucumber

A dip- Greek yogurt ranch or hummus

Sliced cheese (cheddar, Asiago, Colby, or pepperjack)

Crackers or pita chips

1% milkfat cottage cheese

Sliced hard boiled egg

Mixed nuts

It’s not all of that- I pick what sounds good that day and make the plate, but I make sure there’s always a carb, protein, and fat.

I make homemade egg salad (hardboiled eggs, avocado, plain Greek yogurt, with black pepper, dill, and paprika- I think that’s all I put in it, haha) and have that with a sourdough English muffin.

Homemade chicken salad with shredded chicken, avocado, plain Greek yogurt, sliced grapes, celery, chia seeds (weird, it works), lemon juice, black pepper and some other spices. I’ll eat with an English muffin or crackers.

Regular salads. Since I have a hard time with chicken, I usually just use a hardboiled egg as the protein source

Smoothies are awesome for me for an afternoon snack as well!

Like I’ve said, I’ve never been a huge lunch person. Even when I was working, during my breaks I’d still often times pack stuff like this and nibble throughout the day 🙂

Dinners are normal. The first trimester I’d eat whatever sounded like I wouldn’t get sick from, but as I’ve noted in my updates, I don’t really have any aversions- what sounds gross at the time is pretty inconsistent. We’ve been grilling out a lot, making homemade pizzas, tilapia (just once a week) with veggies, pasta, etc. Tyler makes awesome chicken and while sometimes the thought gags me, I can usually do chicken in a wrap or crepe (I LOVE savory crepes!).

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Mocktails have been refreshing as well!

So that’s it! Nothing exciting, but if we are ever blessed with another baby I thought it would be interesting to see if I’m able to eat the same things during the second trimester 🙂

What foods did you love/hate during your pregnancy?

 

 

 

 

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Pregnancy Update (Weeks 27-29)

The past couple of weeks have been busy and I honestly just kept putting off this update, so I’m highlighting three weeks instead of two! Tyler and I flew home during weeks 27-28 and since returning back to Arizona, I’ve been like a crazy person washing, organizing, and setting up things that we received from our baby shower and delivered to our house. My mom threw us the most amazing baby shower, and it was awesome to see so many people! We don’t see extended family and friends often since we live across the country so those that took time out of their day or even traveled for it meant a lot to us. I hate being the center or attention (my anxiety goes through the roof!), but I felt so different that day as we were celebrating our daughter. It was absolutely perfect, although I wish there had been more time since there were so many people that came and I wanted to talk with relatives and friends a bit more. I feel like after I opened gifts, everyone was cleaning up and that was it! Anyways, we’re truly grateful for all of the love and gifts we’ve received 🙂 I will be sharing photos in another post within the next couple of weeks. I’ll be 30 weeks tomorrow- Woo!!!

Maternity clothes? Yes! I can still wear normal workout and pajama shorts below my belly and bigger shirts, but for the most part, it’s maternity.

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28 weeks.

Stretch marks? Nope! Seriously, do genetics have something to do with this?

Sleep: Pretty good. I missed my snoogle while we were away, haha. Still waking up 1-2 times a night to pee, but I sleep SO soundly. However, my dreams are still often times crazy as ever.

Best moment: Our baby shower!! Spending the week with family. Getting clothes and other baby items washed and organized in her drawers and closet. Her room is coming together well- it’s almost done! We’re waiting on one more dresser to be delivered, and then I’ll be able to finish the last of it. We figured it’d be best in the long run to have a complete bedroom set for her (minus the nights stand for now). I’ve also been crafting and giving some decorations a face lift to match her bedroom. I know, I’m lame- but I love it! AND it’s a bit more meaningful and saves some money 😉

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After a day of baby shower prep…then on our way to the celebration! haha

Miss anything? Family- it was so hard to say goodbye and come back to Arizona. I’m missing my dippy eggs on toast with avocado and cheddar cheese and sushi every once in a while, too 😉

Movement: Yes, although during week 29 (this past week), I hadn’t felt anything in 2.5 days. Like at all. Tyler told me to give the nurses line a call on Wednesday (his birthday!), and they told me to go straight to labor and delivery (we checked her heartbeat on our fetal doppler at home, but she still didn’t budge and she usually goes crazy!). Once I was hooked up, the nurse noticed I was having contractions and asked if I had been having them at home. I have been- sometimes A LOT during the day, but they didn’t hurt and I didn’t think anything of it.

Well, they ended up doing a fetal non-stress test to see if I was having more than 6 in an hour…and I was. So they performed a fetal fibronectin test and thankfully, it came back negative (if it’s positive, that’s usually a good indicator that you’ll go into labor within the next 14 days). I was prepared for this test to be God awful after the nurse told me it can be really uncomfortable (they stick a speculum in you without ANY lube, then take a swab of your cervix)…but it actually wasn’t that bad! She also checked my cervix and I’m 1cm dilated, but I was told not to worry unless it starts progressing- so I’m not 😉 The nurse said to take breaks often when I’m on my feet and I have to monitor the contractions. They gave me 10mg of Procardia, but it didn’t completely stop the contractions- I’ve had a few each day since, but no more than 6 in an hour. I have an OB appointment next Thursday, so we shall see!

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29 weeks.

Food cravings: I got my fix of Panera Bread, lemon rice soup, and Gelsosomo’s Pizza (my favorite!) when we were home! I’ve been loving fruit (plain or in a yogurt bowl) and homemade breakfast sandwiches as well. Brownies sound good and I had some when I was home, but I haven’t made any for us yet. Still…nothing that I must have now!

Anything making you feel queasy or sick: Not really….certain things just don’t sound good still (Mexican food, marinara, certain desserts).

Workouts: Just light weights at home.

Showing? Yep.

Gender: Girl 🙂

Symptoms:  See above in the Movement section. I’m also much more fatigued than I was the second trimester. I could probably take a nap most again, but I haven’t yet. Also, I haven’t talked about pregnancy weight gain, but I really don’t think it should be a private matter if you’re comfortable with it, and at my last appointment (week 28), I was up 15 pounds (they obviously weigh you fully clothed). My doctor was great with this as I’m measuring normal and was actually happy to hear that I’ve been eating a healthy diet for myself and the baby. Not that you shouldn’t indulge (believe me, I AM getting some ice cream tonight!), but she said it makes a world of a difference when you eat good throughout pregnancy, not just in weight, but in how the woman feels. Anyways, she said I was right on track, and if I gain a pound a week throughout the remainder of the pregnancy, that will put me at around 25 pounds total which is within healthy range. I don’t really care, but I want to look back at remember these little things 🙂

Belly button in or out? It’s starting to stick out! This happened over the past week (week 29). Will it go back to normal after the baby?!

Wedding ring on or off? On

Emotions: Really happy most of the time (unless I’m hungry or tired, haha)…but I do have moments when I feel really sad that my family isn’t closer during all of this. I know my mom will come down a few weeks after the baby is born (I want the families to come down in rotations- not all at once. I think Tyler’s parents will be the first, then my mom, and hopefully then my brother and sister, and my dad and his girlfriend in late July or August. My brother and sister will be staying with us (we don’t have an extra bedroom at this place, but they’re fine on the couch or blow up mattress, haha), but everyone else will be staying at a hotel which is great because there are so many only minutes away! Plus, I think that will help without me being too overwhelmed with everything 😉

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Me and my sis getting ready to shop!

Looking forward to: Hitting 30 weeks tomorrow!!! We’re going to Phoenix for a Cubs spring training game for the day and I’m excited to spend the day with my man going out to eat, hitting up Ikea, and seeing the game. I’m also taking a four hour beginners photography class on post next Saturday. I’m anxious about it (I get weird when I’m out of my comfort zone, haha), but we bought a Nikon 3300 last year and I NEED to learn how to use it! I have a book, but I still don’t really know what the hell I’m doing and I want to take our own pictures of the baby (that shit is expensive).

What’s Going on with Baby: Baby weighs about 2.5 pounds and is about 15 inches long. Her muscles and lungs are continuing to mature, and she is now very active. She’ll double or even triple in weight from now until birth!

Pregnancy and Body Image

As with most expecting first-time moms, I’ve read a lot of books or articles online focused on pregnancy, child birth, and becoming a parent. I get daily and weekly updates delivered to my email about what’s going on with baby and mother during this time, and these notifications are often times filled with tips to help make this time in your life a bit easier (I actually didn’t sign up for that stuff until I was 20 weeks due to my fear of loss). A few weeks ago, there was a segment on body image during pregnancy and how it can often times be a difficult time for women. This surprised me and got me thinking about my own current body image.

Now, before I talk about how I feel, I want it known that I completely understand why it could be a hard time for females. Our bodies are completely changing and weird things are happening, the scale is going up, we’re tired, don’t feel like ourselves, and can’t work out like we used to. However, I absolutely love my pregnant body. Seeing growth each week makes me happy beyond words. Yes, I’m one of those annoying women.

Despite living in constant fear, battling all day sickness until 5.5 months, and dealing with the cervical length scare, I think I’ve had an uncomplicated pregnancy which probably contributes to how I feel about my body. I’m no dummy though. Some women may be thinking that it’s easy for me to feel this way because of the way my body looked pre-pregnancy. That may contribute to it as I was not carrying around extra weight, but what most people probably don’t know is that I’ve struggled with body image issues for years, and most of the time is was subconsciously. I didn’t realize my disordered eating and over exercising were issues because it was never about the number on the scale- it was about having control over a piece of my life. Therapy will teach you quite a few valuable things along the way 😉

Now, I’m not going to get into my history because this is about how I feel now, but when I think about the past fifteen years of my life, I’ve come a long way the past year and a half. After we lost our first and we started having trouble conceiving, I knew I needed to stop exercising as much and put on some weight. I’ve discussed this in previous blog posts which can be found under the miscarriage/infertility tab on my homepage. To summarize- it was mentally challenging to slow down on the exercise, and at first I wouldn’t accept that this could be a culprit because many women conceive while going about their normal fitness routine or even in the midst of training for marathons. But one day it hit me that I’m not most women- my body was in stress mode and I needed to gain about ten pounds (my lowest body weight ever was scary, and I had no idea until I had to step on the scale at the doctor’s appointment). Despite gaining the ten pounds and refraining from all intense interval training and long runs, I still wasn’t ovulating on my own which was super discouraging and I’d sometimes wonder what the fucking point was. I was upset with my body for not doing what it’s supposed to do. I truly think that all of the shit that happened pre-pregnancy has helped given me a great body image and self confidence during this pregnancy.

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25 weeks.

Don’t get me wrong- I have moments when I look at my arms or thighs and see that they’re not as defined, or my legs or feet or face swell and it’s not pretty, or wonder if my husband really does still think I’m sexy. However, I have a baby inside of me. A fucking baby. The baby I hoped and prayed for and dreamed of for two years, every single day. And although I ate whatever I could tolerate the first 22 weeks or so, now that I don’t have as many bouts of nausea (ironically, as I’m writing this post, I feel super sick), I want to nourish our baby with healthy, wholesome foods. Yes, I ate a small blizzard last night, but I even it out with nutritious meals and snacks as I know she eats what I eat. I’ll be sharing a blog post soon about foods that were great for me the past couple of months!

Also, I’m way out of shape, but going on walks and bike rides and just getting outside can make a huge difference. I’ve mentioned in my pregnancy updates that I do light weights and certain exercises (I don’t know the names of them but my doctor showed me and there are YouTube videos for exercise during pregnancy) to help my core which will hopefully help during birth. I know I’ll get back into shape (but not get to such an unhealthy body weight again!) after she’s born when I’m given the go ahead to start working out again, and I’m embracing my new body.

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26 weeks pregnant. Au natural, haha. I don’t think I’ve posted myself in a bathing suit on social media in years :/

Though I’m still worried, am praying for the rest of the pregnancy and labor and delivery to go well, and just want a healthy baby in my arms, I’m so incredibly content right now. Feeling her kick and play inside of me literally still stops me in my in tracks, and I place my hand on my belly and smile. THAT makes it all worth it- the weight gain, brittle hair and nails, dry skin, bleeding gums, monstrous leaky boobs, fatigue, food aversions- everything.

I’m so glad that I started documenting my belly growth, although I wish I would’ve started around 10 weeks instead of 12. I got the idea from a blog, Simply Summer Ann, but her photos are way better, haha. Nonetheless, it’s a cute way to track the pregnancy and see the changes in a sexy, yet classy way rather than just regular bump pictures in normal clothes.

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Pregnancy is a miraculous thing and I’m not ashamed to embrace it. I may be one of those annoying women that blasts pics on Facebook and Instagram, but I’ve shared our struggles and bad times, so I simply just want to share the good. I will NOT be posting pics of the baby all the time though, and I’m really not sure if I’ll continue on with the blog. We shall see. I’m wanting to start a second Instagram account strictly for baby bump and baby pics, but for some reason I can’t add an account on my iPhone6 which is super annoying. I want the accounts linked to to the same email to make switching over easier, so if anyone knows why the iPhone isn’t able to utilize this feature yet, please let me know! I about whipped my phone across the room last night 😉 Just kidding!

How do you feel about body image and pregnancy?

Did you have a different experience than me?

 

 

Pregnancy Update (Weeks 25 & 26)


I never post these on time- I always switch weeks on Saturdays so I’m actually 27w4d. Oops 😉 I’ve said it before, but the second trimester is going by SO much faster than the first! We had a lot going on during this time- I started the second tri Thanksgiving weekend so the holidays made time go by quickly, but preparing for the move and leaving Texas/getting settled in Arizona seriously made time flash before my eyes. I was scared every single day the first trimester. The fear of another loss consumed me to the point that I didn’t really even want to talk about the pregnancy, and although that apprehension never quite goes away, it has eased up as time has passed. I don’t think I really let my guard down until I was 18/19 weeks, but it’s very common to feel that way after a missed miscarriage (my body was still holding on to the baby when I went in for the D&C at 16 weeks and I still had no signs such as cramping or blood loss). I don’t want to get into the emotional aspect of it too much in this post, so here’s my next biweekly update!

Maternity clothes? Yes to pants, but I can still wear some normal shirts if they’re longer and weren’t skin tight on me normally, haha. Luckily, the weather is getting nice here in Arizona so I can wear maxi skirts and loose dresses as well. It’s been gorgeous out and I’ve even put a swim suit and sat outside with a book a couple of times! I can fit normally into those, except some of the tops are too small.

Stretch marks? Nope!

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Sleep: Sleep has been good! I get up 1-2 times a night to pee but haven’t had issues falling back asleep for the most part. I drink lots of water as it is, but have been trying to chill out before bedtime so I only have to get up once though 😉 I had one or two nights when I couldn’t fall asleep for the life of me. Baby things were running through my head- the upcoming trip home and hoping for no dumb drama, the nursery, buying everything we need, hoping everything is okay, etc. Once I DID fall asleep, it was pretty shitty, but oh well 😉

Best moment: I had my glucose test done and I’m happy to report that I passed! I also got news that my pap back in January came back normal which is always a relief when you have a history of precancerous cells (luckily, it’s been five years since an abnormal pap). During week 26, we had our initial appointment with my new OB here, and we both really like him! We also preregistered at the hospital, got a tour of the labor and delivery wing (the hospital is only 14 months old and super nice!), and signed up for classes. They are every Monday from April 4-May 9 and consist of a series of six courses (2 hours each)- each week a different topic is covered. I’m actually really excited!

Miss anything? Not that I can think of…family, but I’m always missing them 🙂

Movement: Yes! I got a little worried during week 24 (the week we were moving/unpacking) because I felt like I didn’t feel her as much. However, the doctor said that babies are just like us- we all have our more active days and lazier days. I’m on my feet a lot (it’s hard for me to sit still unless I’m in super lazy mode or really tired), but I noticed when I take a break or lay down, that’s when she starts kicking around. She’s also more active in the afternoon and at night than earlier in the day. Starting in a week, I just need to ensure that I feel ten movements every 2 hours when she is most active.

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Food cravings: Still nothing crazy. And to be honest, (I’m sure this may get some eye rolls, haha) I “crave” healthy foods. As I’ve mentioned before, my normal sweet tooth pretty much dissipated when morning sickness kicked in and hasn’t made a mad return. I couldn’t even finish my cheesecake that we brought home from the Cheesecake Factory in Tuscon in a few sittings! I do enjoy homemade smoothies (and homemade chocolate banana or chocolate banana peanut butter once in a while) and the occasional treat though.

Anything making you feel queasy or sick: Still kind of the same- it’s hit or miss with certain foods that I’ve mentioned before. Mexican food still sounds gross. Light, smaller meals work best, but as I’ve mentioned before, I’ve always been more of a grazer. I HATE the feeling of feeling overly stuffed, especially during the day as it makes me lethargic. With my belly continue to grow, I can’t eat big meals or I feel sick.

Workouts: Walking and biking- leisurely though. Tyler and I are really enjoying Arizona and going on bike rides (he usually goes again after we get done as it’s not enough of a work out for him, haha). I need to get some scenery pics from out here- the mountains look beautiful.

Showing? Yep.

Gender: Girl 🙂

Symptoms: I keep forgetting to mention this, but for the past couple of months, I’ve had a bloody nose every morning. Well, it’s not really a bloody nose- when I blow it, there’s some blood, but I’ve never had a full out nose bleed. Gross, I know. It’s a pregnancy symptom and it doesn’t help that we live in a really dry climate. We need to get a humidifier, but are waiting as we’re getting one for the baby anyways. I’m also starting to get tired more easily. Although I experienced morning sickness longer than many women, I regained a lot of energy starting around 15 weeks. I could really use a nap most days again, but I try to refrain from that so I can sleep well at night. I’m experiencing Braxton Hicks, but I didn’t realize what it was for a while. My stomach will get super tight and I’d think she was flipping over or something, but now I know better 🙂

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Belly button in or out? Flat

Wedding ring on or off? On

Emotions: Happy for the most part! I always get anxious before the doctor appointments, so that’s nothing new. I’m just so incredibly thankful right now. I can have moments of being really sensitive, too.

Looking forward to: Going back home and seeing family and friends!!!! And Tuscon does nonstop flights to Chicago Midway (El Paso didn’t when flying Southwest), so I don’t have to get all butt hurt about connecting flights and layovers 🙂 I’m looking forward to our baby shower out there as well….and the start of the third trimester! Also, we got her bedding in and I started getting wall decor and other stuff for her nursery. Tyler goes back to work soon, and I’m excited to continue working on her nursery and doing little projects!

What’s Going on with Baby: Baby’s ears are more developed and sensitive at 26 weeks, so she can now hear us better. She is inhaling and exhaling small amounts of amniotic fluid which is essential for lung development. She continues to put on fat and measures around 14 inches.

Names that Didn’t Make the Final Cut

Naming your baby is one of the most fun things aspects of having a child, yet it can also be the most difficult. For starters, what sounds great to one person can sound butt ugly to their significant other. Then there’s the fact that some people may want to use a family name or they have family and friends giving their opinions. I’ve wrote about it before HERE, but we won’t be announcing her name to anyone (not just on social media) until she is here. However, I want to remember the names that were mentioned but didn’t make the cut, and I thought it would be fun to share that today! Please know, that these are our opinions. If your child is named one of these names or I say something offensive, I really don’t mean to be a B 😉 Oh, and I’m obviously just sharing girl first names.

Whats in a name - swati raiMadelyn- This one was high on my list. I’ve liked this name since middle school and don’t know anyone personally that has it. It’s not the traditional spelling (Madeline), but I didn’t want it to be mistaken for Mad-a-line instead of Mad-a-lyn. I think the nickname Maddie is super cute as well 🙂 Tyler was okay with this name but apparently he knows someone far, far away who named their kid this, so it was a no. No idea who it is so I don’t see how that matters, haha.

Cameron- I don’t love this name, but I like it. I actually like it better as a boy’s name, but I think it’s starting to get more popular which is a bummer. It was hard for me to imagine a baby or little girl being called Cameron, and it doesn’t sound great with our last name. This was a huge NO from Tyler anyways!

Aleksandra- Ok, I’m not into weird spellings, but I like the name Aleks (Alex is fine too, but I like it spelled with a K for some reason). It’s somewhat common, but not overly heard. However, we both know some Alex’s (girls), and sometimes people just ruin a name 😉

Olivia- I really like this name, but Tyler never said no faster in his life, haha. I think Liv would be a cute shortened name (we wanted a full name with an option of it being shortened), but he just hated it. I didn’t protest about this one because it’s gotten popular.

Charlotte- I think Charlotte is SO cute, and while Tyler didn’t hate, he wasn’t too fond of it either.

Mallory- I liked this, but Tyler didn’t. I believe that someone in his family has the name, and we wanted to shy away from that.

Harper- Just like Olivia, I really liked Harper but Tyler thought I was effing crazy. I knew there was very little negotiation with this one, and I wasn’t in love with it, so I didn’t push it. I think this name would get to me after saying it a couple hundred times anyways 😉

You probably noticed that all of the names were my suggestions and Tyler denying them. He didn’t give any suggestions in regards to first names which I thought was odd, but that’s okay. Perhaps he wanted me to have more of a say in the baby’s name because I get no say when or if we have a boy and it’s only fair? I do think the father should have a say in the name- I’d never ever choose a name that my husband hated. However, us women are the one’s that go through pregnancy, labor, delivery, and all the postpartum shit, so I believe we should get the upper hand 🙂

Without saying too much, I knew I wanted something with some meaning, which is why the names above didn’t really touch me. What we chose popped into my head one day, and I remember thinking it was the one…and when I asked Tyler about it, he didn’t even hesitate- he said yes. Now there are a couple that I didn’t mention in case we ever have another baby and it’s a girl…we gotta keep our runner’s up on the down low as well!

What names did you or your significant other like but you didn’t end up going with?

 

Life Lately- February 2016

I’ve been pretty much just writing solely about pregnancy lately (sorry about that, but I have lots to say about various aspects of it!), and haven’t given an update about what else is going on with us. So that’s what I’m going to do today 🙂

While I’ve done some posts about the military life and deployment, I don’t talk about my husband’s career on here very much. However, he got promoted to Captain back in November and to say I’m super proud of him is an understatement! Once you get Captain, you go to Captain Career Course in whatever branch you’re in. My husband spent his time as a second and first Lieutenant in Field Artillery but will be Military Intelligence for the remainder of his career. Which brings me to our next topic…wemoved to Arizona!

The school he will attend is at a post in Arizona and because the move is a PCS (permanent change of station) versus a TDY (temporary duty station), I was able to go with 🙂 You get a choice of what kind of move you want when you’re in the military- a DITY move which is where you pack everything yourself and move everything yourself then get reimbursed for the cost or a move where the military hires a company to come out and pack up all of your shit then a moving company comes and moves it all for you to your designated location.

We’ve never done and more than likely never will do a DITY move, but I’ve heard a lot of people say they make money off the move by doing it themselves. However, I couldn’t imagine packing our entire house with a full-time job every few months or couple of years. You’re in full control of your belongings as well and some people have had bad experiences with items getting damaged along the way. We’ve had a few pieces of furniture get a little banged up, but nothing crazy. You have to load and unload all of your furniture (I guess a lot of people get their friend to help them; however), but I’m wondering how the heck people unload everything themselves if they don’t know anyone at their next duty station? We have some nice, heavy, big ass furniture that was pretty hard to move, haha. Ive heard some people have to wait a while to get their stuff delivered to their new place, but I don’t see the big deal. It’s not like I’m going to die without my house full of shit for a week or two 😉 Tyler’s done a handful of PCS’s, one even being to Italy, so I guess he’s one of the lucky ones that has never had an issue with packers or movers. Anyways….

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What you have to do for fun when there’s no TV and you’re sleeping on a mattress, haha.

We are LOVING our new location! It’ll be nice to get out of the Southwest one day (we PCS again in September or October- only here for about 8-9 months), but it just feels so much cleaner and prettier out here (sorry El Paso, friends!). It is a much smaller town- slow paced and laid back which just feels so right at this time in our lives. There’s a Target, Walmart, Marshalls, Ross, Hobby Lobby, small mall with a movie theater, Home Depot and Loews, Petsmart and a few chain restaurants (I like local restaurants better, but oh well. We ate out a lot during the moving transition and I’m so over it for a while anyways, haha). I actually like how there are limited shopping options out here and was surprised that there’s a Hobby Lobby which is perfect as there are a few things I want to make for the baby!

I love our neighborhood (there is an HOA so neighbors can’t be complete hillbillies like at our last place!) and we’ve met one set of neighbors that are super nice. Large sidewalks are on the side of the streets and there’s a nature path- we’ve already gone on a few bike rides together and Tyler’s been running. We have a view of the mountains from the back of our house and it’s awesome to look out our bedroom window or sit out on our patio and see such peace 🙂 The dogs are loving it, too. The living room and bedrooms (aside from ours) is carpeted. Our old house was all tile and they seem to like the carpet much better…although I’m anal and vacuum every other day.

View of our entryway. That puzzle of Times Square in that hallway doesn’t match, but we put it together (1000 pieces, FML) right after Tyler got home from his deployment. It was an awesome thing to do to help bond again!

Post is obviously much smaller than Fort Bliss. Fort Bliss may not be in the most ideal area, but it’s pretty bad ass- the common area is new (the PX, commissary, a handful of restaurants and shopping, and movie theater) and I’ve heard there is no other post like it yet as it was the first. I still don’t know my way around post yet but I can’t get any more lost there than I did on Bliss, haha. Some people have asked me over the years why we choose to live off post rather than on. I might write a whole blog entry about it, but for now- we just want to 🙂 We’ve never lived on (well, Tyler did when he was in the barracks years ago, but that’s different), so I’m not saying one is better than the other. However, when Tyler is done with work he wants to be done and not surrounded by all things army. We also like receiving a BAH (basic housing allowance) that goes towards covering the cost of rent or a mortgage. We rented in El Paso and are renting here, but are hoping to purchase a home at our next duty station depending on where it’s at. We don’t use our entire BAH for rent- you have to think about utilities as well so you’re not overspending. You can actually make some money if your living arrangements cost less than what your BAH is. Ok, that’s enough about that. Boring!

What else…Tyler started two more grad school classes last week and only has two more left until he’s done with his Masters! The last two are capstone classes which he’ll have to write a thesis for, so with that, CCC, and a new baby, he’s going to have a busy year! The majority of his grad school classes were covered as well (he’s getting his Masters in Military Intelligence and Management), so that’s pretty damn nice, especially considering that we’re paying a pretty penny on my student loans a month to get them knocked out. He doesn’t like me talking about him regarding this type of stuff, but I’m super proud of him!

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Hot chocolate and iced coffee before exploring Tombstone!

While I’m grateful that I’ve been able to stay home the past few months and continue to do so while the baby is super small, I’m also missing contributing financially and working makes me feel good- like accomplished, if that makes sense. I know it won’t be like this forever, so I’m really trying to take advantage of this time and I know it’ll be amazing once the baby comes. The tentative plan is that I’ll work once we get to our next duty station and the baby will be about 5-6 months old by then which works out perfect!

I think that’s about it. This week we plan on visiting Bisbee (we went to Tombstone and Tuscon last week which was fun!) and getting ready for our trip home. We received out crib and I’ve started a to-do list for after we get home in regards to things I need/want to do before her arrival! Hope everyone has a great week 🙂

Pregnancy Update (Weeks 23 & 24)

It’s been over two weeks since I’ve posted anything because it’s been so crazy around here! Between tying up loose ends in Texas, moving to Arizona, unpacking everything and getting settled in (we don’t mess around- everything was unpacked and put in place within a few days- I can’t stand a mess or shit just laying around!), getting doctor and new OB stuff taken care of (first appointment with the new OB on the 25th), getting some things for the house, and learning our way around town- I haven’t had too much free time. And honestly, when I have had it, it’s been nice to relax with my husband since he’s on leave 🙂 I’m getting this post out late as I’m already going to be 26 weeks tomorrow, but I figured better late than never!

Maternity clothes? Yes- pants, although I can still wear some normal leggings. I’m in a weird stage where my normal shirts are getting too short yet maternity tops are effing huge. I’m not petite (and my boobs have gotten huge- I’m falling out of my 34C bras so I’m pretty sure I’m a D but refuse to buy a new bra as there’s so much for the baby we need to buy, haha), but I’m smaller framed yet I’m about 5’8″ and I feel like a lot of maternity clothes aren’t made for “skinny” women (hope that doesn’t sound bad, but it’s been getting frustrating). I also don’t want to look like a garage bag in a huge t-shirt or something. I’m SO happy and proud to be pregnant and I feel good in my changing body, and I want it to show!

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Trying to find a decent baby shower dress. Not successful yet.

Stretch marks? Nope!

Sleep: Sleep was absolutely awful during weeks 23 and 24. I know this had to do with the stress of the move, sleeping on a queen sized mattress on the floor for nearly two weeks with Tyler and Wrigley trying to weasel his way between us (we have a king and even though I was getting shitty sleep, I felt too bad kicking him out of the room!). I felt a lot crappier (and moodier) most days because of the lack of good sleep, too. I’d wake up due to my lower back aching as well, but I didn’t have my snoogle with me, so perhaps that was it? haha. But we got out bed back at the end of week 24 and all was well again! 🙂

Best moment: Always, always, always feeling the baby kick. This will never get old to me. Also, it sounds weird, but I have been waiting to hit the 24 week mark which is when the baby’s chances of surviving outside of the womb start increasing. Nothing is a sure thing in life, but this brought us a little comfort, and I know each passing day will only bring us that much closer. Finally moving was a pretty great moment as well. We have been waiting for this for months, and while El Paso wasn’t too bad, we were ready for change and to start a new chapter. And, I must say, so far we LOVE it out here in Arizona! We are in a small town but only about an hour from Tuscon and 3 hours from Phoenix, so it’s an awesome location and beautiful weather and scenery.

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Even the dogs love our new place!

Miss anything? I missed my bed during these 2 weeks, haha. That’s all 🙂

Movement: Yes, like crazy! She seems much more active in the evening, but her movement is getting so much more frequent.

Food cravings: I really wanted fajitas before we left El Paso and it was good while I was eating it, but now all Mexican food sounds gross 😦 I still have some food aversions and honestly not a lot of cravings. In a way I’m thankful for this as healthy, nutritious foods are what sound best- fruits, homemade smoothies, raw veggies with hummus or Greek yogurt dip, hard boiled eggs, cottage cheese and pita chips/crackers, granola. If I DO have a craving, I’ll of course indulge, but it hasn’t really happened that much. Oh wait- sushi sounded SO good during week 23, but that can’t happen 😉

Anything making you feel queasy or sick: Chicken sometimes still or the thought of anything really sweet, but this isn’t constant. Red sauces still sound kinda gross.

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So, we got rid of the floor lamp we’d been using to capture my weekly bump photos (it was a huge piece and was kinda broken). Unfortunately, this means I have to change how the weekly photos look, but I’m working on making the lighting better. Also, I don’t have a week 24 bumpdate pic 😦 Things got hectic and by the time I thought about it, it was Friday which meant I was 25 weeks the next day so I said f it 😉

Workouts: I didn’t work out at all during these weeks. I’m still taking it easy due to the cervical length thing and with moving and unpacking, I figured that was enough. And let me tell ya, I really felt it in my back while unpacking! I’m sure it was being on my feet like all day (Tyler would make me take mini breaks here and there and put my feet up!) and the lifting and constantly bending over and putting things away/cleaning.

Showing? Yep 🙂

Gender: Girl 🙂

Symptoms: Movement, lower back ache, fatigue, food aversions, growing belly.

Belly button in or out? Pretty much flat. 

Wedding ring on or off? On

Emotions: Somewhat emotional about the move at times but excited as well. I also started getting anxious about our upcoming trip back home to Indiana. It will be a busy week, but I just want everything to go smoothly and for there to be no drama. I’m NOT putting up with any of that 😉

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Looking forward to: Spending lots of time with Tyler over the next few weeks (perks of the military- saving leave and getting 30 DAYS off! Such an amazing time for him to be home and I’m grateful for that). Exploring our new town. Setting up the nursery 🙂 Going back to Indiana for a week with family/friends and our baby shower. It’s going to be bittersweet though as it’ll probably be the last time I stay at my mom’s condo during our trips home. I plan on sleeping there with my sister and brother (Tyler will sleep at his parents about 10 minutes away), but it’s a condo so there isn’t much extra room, and after the baby is born, we will want to stay together with her, of course! Might sound weird for us to split up during the week, but it’s just sleep and I’m comfortable- it’s home to me- so I don’t see the big deal. It’s great that we’re from the same hometown, but also tricky dividing time between the families.

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I think I might use this look as I continue doing bump photos. Or the photo directly above. Thoughts? I love the antique look!

What’s Going on with Baby: Baby is about 8.5 inches long and weighs about 1.5 pounds and is growing at a rapid pace. Her face is pretty much fully formed and she has eyelashes, eyebrows, and hair, although it’s white since there is no pigment yet. Her skin is still somewhat transparent, but this won’t last for very long as she starts piling on fat.

So that’s it! The past month has flown by and it’s crazy to think that I’m nearly 6.5 months pregnant now. A year ago, my husband was deployed and it sucked the life out of me just trying to get through the day without crying….but I don’t like thinking about that- it still makes me sad… Now that we’re settled, I should be posting 1-2 times a week again and have a few things on my agenda that I’ve been meaning to write about. I’ll be back early next week with a little update more focused on us rather than baby stuff! Hope everyone has a great weekend!

Pregnancy Update (Weeks 21 & 22)

***I’m late with posting this as I’m 23w4d, but the packers came last Friday so I made this post from my iPhone which I did NOT like, haha. 

Maternity clothes? Yes and no. I wore nothing but yoga pants/leggings the past two weeks and they weren’t maternity, but they were considered my “looser” ones before pregnancy. However, I have to wear the leggings under my belly which is more uncomfortable to me, so that isn’t gonna last much longer. I only do this with my “cheapy” Forever 21 leggings, NOT my nice ones from Nordstroms. Those are packed away and will not be stressed out! 😉 Shirts are getting shorter, but I can still get away with most of my normal ones as long as they weren’t skin tight to begin with and are a little longer.

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    21w5d

I also started looking online for a dress for our shower the beginning of March (okay, I’ve only looked at Pink Blush, haha). It’s back home in Indiana so it’s gonna be cold which kinda limits things. I also think I wanna wear boots as I ain’t parading around in high heels for hours. That sucks the life out of me when I’m NOT pregnant, and I want to be comfortable, but cute, of course 😉 If you have any suggestions, please let me know! I’ll hit up the mall within the next few weeks to find something decent to take with and hopefully go shopping with my mom and sis when we’re in town if if nothing I see out here appeals to me.

Stretch marks?  Nope!

Sleep: I finally caught the cold that Tyler when I was exactly 21 weeks, and needless to say, it was awful. Sleep during that time wasn’t great, but thats expected when you can’t freaking breathe. I’m using the Snoogle every night. Keep in mind that we have a king sized bed so we fit comfortably still. Snoogle are massive, but I really think it was a good investment.

Best moment: Feeling her movements get stronger! I’ll seriously never get sick of feeling her.

While I was sick and napping, Tyler surprised me and made a batch of homemade lemon rice soup. He rarely cooks and he’s never made it before, but he went to the grocery store to get the ingredients and gave it a try- and it turned out AWESOME! I’ve been craving it from a restaurant back home and it was such a sweet gesture.

We also went house hunting and chose the home we will be living in while Tyler attends Captain Career Course. It’s newer and nicer than the one we’re in now, but also 400 square feet smaller. I’m hoping everything fits nicely!

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Miss anything? Nope. I miss my family a lot though and I’m super excited to see them in early March!

Movement: Yes! I feel her a lot throughout the day and it’s so fucking awesome to see movement through my belly! Seriously my favorite part of everyday 🙂 

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Food cravings: No…still no real cravings. No fun, eh? Perhaps I’m one of those pregnant women that just don’t get wild cravings, but we still have a long while to go. Because a lot of things don’t sound great, I’ve been making a smoothie a day to help ensure I’m getting the extra calories I need. No, I don’t count calories, but I have a pretty good idea of what I eat amounts to.

Anything making you feel queasy or sick: Pretty much the same. I’m still not feeling desserts, but I can do hot chocolate once in a while. Pasta, marinara sauce, raw spinach, and plain chicken still sound gross (I can do chicken in dishes though, just the thought of chicken alone makes me feel sick). The thought of scrambled eggs makes me nauseous sometimes as well, but hard boiled eggs are good!

Workouts: They were nonexistent the 5 days that I pretty much laid around all day while I was sick.

I also got news at 22w4d that my cervical length was only measuring 2.6cm- the measurement before that, five weeks prior, was 3.5cm. This sent me into a panic as I know how real preterm labor can be and that your cervix will only continue to decrease as time goes on because the baby is growing bigger. We are also moving so I’ll be in between docs for a little bit and I didn’t want this to go left uncared for. My doc said there isn’t much we could do at this pint as I’m too far along for a clerege but not far enough along for the shot to help lung development should anything happen over the next few weeks. Plus, they don’t start to be concerned until it’s 2.5 or below (uhh .1cm away doesn’t seem like much but who knows!). So I was advised to take it easy- no heavy lifting or strenuous exercise and to take frequent breaks when I’m on my feet. I’ll be remeasured next week! ***I was remeasure yesterday at 23w3d and it was 2.9 at the shortest length! I’m still going to continue not overdoing it but it’s a relief that it was measuring a bit better 🙂 

Showing? Yes! Although if I’m wearing a big hoodie and sweats I look completely normal, haha.

Gender: Girl 🙂

Symptoms: Sneezing still. Bleeding gums when I floss! I know it’s gross but I was like wtf when it started happening. I floss every single night (super gross when people don’t and I’m trying to get my husband to at least use the waterpik), and I had a dentist appointment for a cleaning during week 21 (teeth look perfect, woo!) and they said it’s completely normal. I’m gonna miss my dentist office as they’re SO nice and thorough (I’ve been to quite a few over the years who have fucked up fillings and crowns)…one of the few downsides of moving!

I don’t think I’ve mentioned it before but my boobs are huge. I was always a 34C, then when I got off birth control and started really running and working out about 4-5 years ago, I dropped down to a 32C/34B. I kept all my bigger bras, but I’m literally spilling out of them. Maybe I’ll pick up a bigger cheapy one somewhere someday, haha.

Belly button in or out? In

Wedding ring on or off? On

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Had to add this as he’s just so cute!!

Emotions: Kind of all over the place. We sold a few things in preparation of our move and I got super emotional because this cheap ass lady offered pretty much next to nothing for something that was considered “mine” before we were married (it was my moms and though it didn’t have a special meaning in our family, I got all bent about it, haha).

I’m anxious about the move but excited at the same time. I’m unbelievably happy most of the time though, and I’m still in awe when I look at myself in the mirror and see my belly or feel her kicking 🙂

Looking forward to: Moving and getting our new home set up!

I know for sure I want maternity photos done, but I’m also playing around with the idea of getting ones done that are a little, I don’t know what word to use, sexier? Not like full blown nude, haha, but in tasteful lingerie and pearls. I hate a boudoir shoot done while Tyler was deployed and made him a book on Shutterfly and it turned out awesome! I know a lot of women don’t like pregnancy and bitch about blowing up and feeling unattractive, but I’m loving my new curves an growing belly and want to embrace it. I honestly don’t know if I’d feel the same way had we not experienced a miscarriage or trouble conceiving again, but I’m NOT taking this amazing time in my life for granted as it very well may never come again. What are your thoughts on this?

What’s Going on with Baby: At 11 inches and almost 1 pound (about the size of a spaghetti squash), your baby is starting to look like a miniature newborn. His lips, eyelids, and eyebrows are becoming more distinct, and he’s even developing tiny tooth buds beneath his gums. His eyes have formed, but his irises (the colored part of the eye) still lack pigment. **Taken from Babycenter.com!


 

Pregnancy After a Loss and/or Infertility

This topic has been something that I’ve been thinking about ever since I found out that I was pregnant. It’s a sensitive subject and emotional subject, and it may be a bit difficult for me to write, but bear with me. Pregnancy after a loss and/or infertility is much different than a normal pregnancy. A “normal” pregnancy may consist of naiveness, innocence, and happy thoughts of ten months out. However, after you experience a loss, go through infertility, or both, your thought process is unlike it was before. For me, pregnancy the second time around has differed so much from an emotional standpoint.

I wanted to write about this and bring awareness to it as I think there’s sometimes a gap between these two types of women (or three, if you experience infertility).

  • You’ll be checking for blood multiple times a day…but this still doesn’t ease your mind. My first pregnancy ended in a missed miscarriage, meaning the baby had passed (ours around week 12), but I had literally no symptoms of an impending loss. No blood, no cramping- nothing, and we found out at an ultrasound at 14 weeks. This time around, I’d check every time I used the restroom even though I knew that this does not ensure that all is okay. We did have a little scare when I was 13 weeks as I had some brown spotting (brown means old blood and red means new blood. Red is not a good sign). It happened in the late afternoon after cleaning and running errands all day, and I spent the rest of the evening laying down, drinking lots of water. I called my doctor the next morning and she said to come to the hospital to get it checked out. Long story short- they couldn’t determine the exact cause, but baby was doing great and I was put on light bed rest for a few days. We were so relieved, but I felt awful as we missed Tyler’s promotion ceremony that morning to get pinned Captain (he was actually promoted November 1st) 😦 Anyways, checking will be constant.
  • You’ll become worried when your morning sickness dissipates. Yes, most women are ecstatic when they start feeling better, but my mind started to wander when I’d have a few hours or days where I wasn’t dry-heaving constantly or running to the bathroom. It’s very common for all day sickness to come and go, and even though it wasn’t fun not feeling well, it was comforting to me as it reminded me that I was, indeed, pregnant. You see, the first time my morning sickness started to ease up around week 11 and by week 12 I was feeling totally back to normal…and that’s when the baby passed, so that was obviously on my mind. This time my doctor offered to give me medicine to help with the sickness, but I politely declined. It probably sounds crazy, but I didn’t want the meds in my system. I am fortunately not currently working outside of the home, so I had time to rest and take naps if I needed to. Keep in mind that I’m also one of those women who do not eat lunch meat, soft cheeses, or literally anything else that you “aren’t supposed” to eat while pregnant. Great for those women who have the balls to do it, but I don’t as I’m not risking anything.
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Though morning sickness was no fun, I was so unbelievably happy to get to experience pregnancy again that I didn’t care!

  • You’ll be absolutely over the moon but also incredibly terrified. The first time around I was like most other first-time pregnant women- I knew miscarriages occurred, but I never thought that it’d happen to me. A loss hurts no matter how many weeks along you are, but I believe the further you are in a pregnancy, the more difficult it is to grasp that it truly happened.  We waited two years to see two pink lines again. We watched some women who were pregnant the same time I was have their baby, then get pregnant and birth their second…That being said, when you do get pregnant again, you’re afraid that it’ll happen to you once more as reoccurring loss is a very real thing for some couples. It’s a very bizarre feeling to be so happy yet scared at the same time. It was NOT comforting when people would say that it wouldn’t happen again- no one can predict the future. However, my doctor just kept telling me to “just believe” at every appointment and that this is a different pregnancy, a different baby. I still hold onto those words 🙂
  • You won’t give a shit if the baby is a boy or a girl. I think this is why I had such a difficult time when people would ask if it was a boy or girl and/or what we wanted. We honestly did not care whatsoever (if my husband did deep down, he never told me)- we just wanted a healthy baby. I know, I know- that’s what everyone wants, but it’s the truth. As I mentioned before, I didn’t care if we had a boy first to be the protector should he have siblings one day or whatever. I was the oldest and no one protected me and I didn’t turn out that bad 😉 We do think it would be nice to have two children closer in age than we were with our siblings, but part of the reasoning is because of our age. However, I’m super close with my brother and sister and I don’t believe age really matters when you’re adults, but it does impact things when you’re kids. I’d love to have children that have a close bond just as I have and for my husband to get to see that (sometimes I think he wonders what the hell I could possibly be talking about with my family every single day haha, but I think that’s part of what makes life beautiful- having such connection!). Who knows, we may just be blessed with one child and we would be perfectly happy with that!
  • When women bitch about the pitfalls of pregnancy you’ll still get annoyed. I get it- morning/all day sickness isn’t fun, but complaining about it openly on social media outlets will still drive you effing nuts. Some people crave for attention more than others so while it may seem innocent to them to share every single day about how shitty they feel, it can actually be hurting a lot of people. I know- appeasing everyone is impossible, but it’s more about just being a mindful human being. I’d literally bring plastic Wal-Mart or Target bags with me when I left the house the first 15 weeks because I was afraid I might barf at any second, and I still have bouts of nausea at 22 weeks…but you’ll never hear me complain (obviously I’d tell those closest to me that I felt sick when asked, but it was never bitching because as I said earlier, it was a comfort and I was so grateful for that). Certain things may seem sucky, but you know what’s even suckier? Going through morning sickness for weeks and weeks and feeling so much love and so much excitement for this little one growing inside of you, only to have it taken away when you stupidly thought you were in the “safe zone”. Then yearning for it again so long and so hard, spending countless hours crying over negative pregnancy tests and pregnancy announcements, getting shitty test results from the doctor, feeling so alone and angry and sad and everything in between, and enduring uncomfortable and painful procedures to try and get some answers. You look at the miracle of life a tad bit differently, and know that feeling like shit or being constipated or breaking out badly or being tired ISN”T SHIT in the grand scheme of things.
  • You’ll still experience pregnancy jealousy- This is a biggie. I thought I was crazy at first, but I’ve spoken with several women in the loss and infertility community that said they feel the same way. Even though I’m pregnant, I still get weird when I’m sitting at the doctor’s office for an appointment in a room full of super pregnant ladies. Yes, I have a bump, but when women are visibility more pregnant than me, I wish it were me because I’m still so scared. I’ve heard from some women that this feeling eases up once you hit viability, but I don’t know. I’m truly happy when I see pregnancy announcements, but I still wonder how long they were trying. If they announce it super early, I wonder how they have the strength to do so.  The innocence that some women have that never endured a loss or infertility and that have had happy, worry-free pregnancies can be aggravating, especially when they try to give you advice. It’s a very, very different experience.

***I wanted to add a bit more to this before I publish this as I experienced this yet again today while waiting to get my oil changed. I had an ultrasound this morning for another cervical length check, and when I was leaving the room after it was finished I glanced at the nurse’s computer screen and thought I saw the length measuring almost one centimeter shorter than it was about five weeks prior. One centimeter may not seem like a lot but it is when it comes to your cervix during pregnancy. I could still kick myself for not asking the nurse about it, but I know they can’t release much information to you. I’m apprehensive and a bit scared right now and I should be able to pick up the results on Wednesday. I won’t go any further about this until I actually read the report and discuss it with my doctor…but while my car was being tended to, I saw a mother feeding her newborn baby in the waiting area and I once again felt those feelings of jealousy. I’m not even sure if that’s the right word to describe it…it’s more like super intense feelings of hope and desire that I’ll get to that point one day. It took me everything now to to cry. Anyways, it probably sounds odd, but I’m just being real…

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Rainbows have a whole different meaning after a loss. A rainbow baby is one that is born after a couple experiences a miscarriage…

  • You’ll be be hesitant as to what to say when asked if it’s your first. I was kind of taken back when asked if it’s my first, and it was obviously by random people that didn’t know us or by nurses. I always tell the nurses no, it’s not my first. It was (and still is) odd to me when they say, “One child at home?” and I again proceed to say no, the first was a miscarriage. I don’t like how it’s sometimes assumed that I already have a living child. I know people mean absolutely no harm when asking this, but it puts me in a predicament. Do I want to say no- that this is our second, and our first was a late first trimester loss- to those that are asking me just because outside of the doctor’s office? No, because that makes people uncomfortable. And some people don’t recognize miscarriages as “real” children. Or do I say, yes this is our first? This answer makes me feel guilty and sad for not recognizing our first baby. A few times when I said it’s our first, they proceeded to say something along the lines of, “That’s awesome you guys waited so long!” (they obviously knew my age or that we’ve been for quite a while). Seriously…these remarks make me wanna dropkick them…but once again, they don’t know any better… I know I’ll struggle with this question my entire pregnancy, but I truly want to acknowledge our first loss without sounding dramatic or making others feel awkward. But then again, I don’t want to feel uncomfortable either. I’ll always feel that if miscarriage and infertility are more openly discussed, it’ll become less taboo and women will feel less alone.

I know there are so many other instances I could discuss regarding the differences, but I’ll stop there for now. I don’t mean to segregate those that have not endured a loss or infertility from those that have. These are just observations from my personal experience and from what I’ve discussed with other women in similar situations. I feel that the women that I’ve encountered that have been affected are much more guarded than those that still retain the innocence and naiveness of not suffering, but that’s not always the case. However, pregnancy is an absolute beautiful thing and we are all on different paths emotionally and physically with one common denominator- a smooth ride and healthy baby 🙂

Why We are Keeping Her Name to Ourselves and Our Criteria

When people find out that you’re expecting, the questions come flooding in about when you’re due, how you’re feeling, the gender, etc. After people learn the gender, the big question is “What is his/her name?”. I LOVE knowing what others are naming their little one, so I completely understand why the question is asked. I’m weird and I also like to know why certain names were picked- Is there a special meaning behind it? Is it a family name? Did they pick it just because?

As I’ve mentioned before, although I’ve opened up my life about our struggles with enduring a loss and infertility, I’m not that open about everything. Yes, I am documenting my pregnancy but it’s for me to look back on one day. I want to remember all the happiness, sadness, fearfulness, craziness- everything- that it entailed. As you all know, I didn’t even announce the pregnancy on here or other social media outlets until I was nearly four months along and even most family members didn’t know until almost the end of the first trimester. Something happened when I got the positive pregnancy test where I just wanted to keep this amazing miracle a secret. And I can’t explain why.

The news is out that I’m pregnant. Everyone knows that we’re having a baby girl. But the name….that’s something we’re going to be keeping to ourselves. Why? Because we can 😉 No, but for real- not everything has to be an open book. I get that family and friends are excited- we are, too! Lots of people announce the name right away after revealing the gender and that’s great and all but that’s not me (or my husband). Now, obviously I’m not going to be all weird about it to strangers. For example, I was at the dentist yesterday and my hygienist was talking to me about it. I’m never going to see this woman again and she has no connection to our world so why not? Haha. And quite frankly, I don’t want to hear anyone’s opinions about it. If I want your opinion, I’ll ask 😉

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We are 99% sure about it but have recently ran into a hiccup. However, I’m almost certain it won’t change, but Tyler and I have to discuss it again. As cliche as it sounds, when this name came to mind, it seriously warmed my heart. Then I ran it by Tyler and he instantly said yes…and I just knew. There is somewhat of a special meaning behind it as well, which I wanted but it wasn’t a deal- breaker, so it’s perfect!

I will say some things about the criteria of choosing a name though 🙂

  • Our name picks are NOT super trendy. While there are many beautiful popular names, I didn’t want her in a class having like 3 other girls with it as well.
  • Names that are not made up. Either some people don’t think about this or they simply just don’t care, but we didn’t want something crazy where people would question if we were high or not while making this decision. It’s amusing to me when people do this to their children to be unique, but then again, my name is Kimberly which sounds like either a 1960s housewife or hippies name, haha 😉 Just kidding mom- I like my name!
  • No whack ass spellings. Or multiple spellings. We didn’t want something that could be spelled six different ways.
  • We wanted a name that could be shortened for a nickname. Kimberly = Kim or Kimmy. Tyler doesn’t have that option unless you count TJ. Ty drives me crazy, lol, and while I’ve referred to him as TJ on here before, I always just call him Tyler. I wanted the nickname to be just as pretty as the whole name as well. *This wasn’t a deal-breaker either but was taken into consideration and preferred.
  • No exes. I think this rings true for everyone on the planet!
  • Nothing too cute. Let’s face it- some names just more suitable for babies/children OR older adults. We wanted something timeless.
  • Has to flow well together. I’m weird about syllables and after explaining this to Tyler, he understood the importance of proper name flow, haha. A one syllable first and one syllable middle name sounds odd together, for example.

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It may seem like we had a lot of criteria, but we really didn’t. When you say a name out loud you almost always know whether or not you like it. If you think you like a name, say it out loud about a thousand times then see how you feel about it 😉

Tyler didn’t contribute a single first name suggestion at all, haha. I kept asking him to but he’d just tell me to say some and he’d tell me what he thought. I don’t know if it was out of laziness on his part or the fact that he picked the boys name and I didn’t get a say, but it was still fun to think of names and discuss it. A few times I knew he kind of liked the name but he knew somebody that had a kid with it (who cares- we don’t live by them nor have I even met them!) so those were thrown out the window. Lots were rejected right away for no reason other than him not liking them, but I can understand that as I’m the same way- sometimes there isn’t a reason. Which brings us back to the original thoughts of this post 😉

Haha, Tyler and I have some inside jokes about this 😉

As awesome and exciting as this time is, when our little girl makes her debut in the world, that’s when we will announce her name. We’ve been waiting so long and tried so hard for this, so I hope people respect our wishes. I think it’d be fun to put together a post on the ones that were rejected though, so be on the look out for that over the next couple of weeks!

Did you announce the baby name before birth? Why or why not?

How did you choose the baby name?